HOSTEL (duh duh duuuuunnnn)

When we first said we were doing this, 90% of people responded with, “Have you seen the movie Hostel?” So I thought I would describe to you our first hostel experience.

First, they were kind enough to pick us up from the train station. They showed us to their vehicle which was an unmarked van. When we got inside the van they asked to put black sheets over our heads so we wouldn’t see where we were going. This, they told us, was because it was an exclusive hostel and they didn’t want us to tell others how to get there. When we arrived they carried our bags for us and checked us in without us having to do anything, which I thought was a nice service. The first appearance of the building was very drab and dark, but I figured it was just an attempt to throw off any unwanted persons who wandered in, being that it was an exclusive hostel. We were walked down a narrow hall and then escorted down a series of stairs which seemed to lead to the cellar. When we arrived at our room I was very surprised to see it mostly empty, resembling something of an old medical examination room. I went to complain to management because there must be some mistake. We paid for a room with a private bathroom attached and this room clearly did not have one. Management did not seem to care and slammed the door in my face after which I heard what sounded like the door being locked from the outside. I am appalled. I most certainly will not be recommending this hostel to anyone.

Just kidding. We are staying in a hostel in Florence. The pictures they posted on the website showed happy and vibrant communal areas, which gave the hostel a very ‘hip’ look. No surprise, they did not include pictures of the rooms, but we will get to that later.

The hostel most certainly did not pick us up from the train station. In fact they posted the most vague directions possible on locating their building which consisted of “Exit the north side of the train station. Cross the Avenue. Turn right and follow the street. You will see the hostel.” First question, at 10 o’clock at night, which direction is north? Second question, which avenue am I crossing? Because the train station is next to a roundabout. 

We ended up hopping the No. 17 bus and it took us many miles from the train station; nothing we would’ve wanted to walk to that late at night with our bags. Even after we found the bus we had no idea where to get off or how to find the building. Luckily, Randy happened to ask a girl sitting across from us and she was staying at the same hostel, so she was kind enough to show us where it was. The entry gate to the hostel was right behind a giant church, sort of tucked away and not at all as easy to find as their crappy directions would suggest.

We walked into the courtyard where at least 15 random travelers were hanging out for the night, sharing music and stories or just having a smoke. We check in and are given instructions on how to find our room. “Down the hall, last door on your right (which he meant left), you’ll see the elevator. Third floor, turn right down the hall, number 26.”  So we walk down the first hall to find the elevator and it takes us through the cafeteria where everyone who is eating dinner stops to stare at us. We felt like fresh meat in the market. We proceed to the elevator and when it arrives we barely meet the 4 person capacity with our luggage. We squeeze in just enough for the door to close.

We arrive at our floor and it is just a hallway of doors with linoleum floors and no windows. I’m not talking like hotel or apartment hallway of doors I’m talking like hospital hallway of doors. It’s a pretty wide hallway, with bare cream colored walls and Solomon colored doors. The walls have been sparsely decorated with random 8” x 10” pictures from the 1970’s of surrounding tourist attractions.  I’m sure this building use to be a nunnery or an orphanage since it is behind the church, but I like to think it use to be a mental institution to make the stay more exciting.

We open our door and get hit with an awful stench and then a view of our sad little room. Two double beds pushed together (which seems to be the norm in Europe), a wooden armoire, writing desk, and two chairs. We have a colored pencil poster of what looks like Venice on the wall facing the bed, but it just looks out of place on an otherwise barren surface. We also have a window and a pretty nice view of the area. The floor is made of red brick tiles and I would venture to say it is the original flooring of the building. I’m not sure they clean it very often because our feet get dirty after walking on it.

The funniest part of the room is the bathroom. We paid €4 extra to have a private bathroom rather than share one. It wasn’t a big deal if we had to share one, but it was so cheap we figured why not. The bathroom is very similar to one you would find in a trailer, and I don’t mean a double wide. It looks like they just threw a box in here, hooked up the plumbing and called it good. The bathroom box is about 2 - 3 feet lower than the actual ceiling and pushed up against the wall but not actually attached to any wall. The floor inside the bathroom is uneven because it sits directly on top of the tiles underneath, and I am certain there are some tiles missing where there is a larger dip in the floor. Starting from the back corner and working our way out, there is a shower which is about 2 feet wide by 3 feet deep and the door is like an accordion partition. It folds up to one side when not in use and always gets stuck when you try to enclose yourself in the shower. Next there is a toilet. Pretty standard, although there is no tank, just a push button in the wall above, just below where the toilet paper sits on the shelf. There is no toilet paper ring or thing of that nature, you just pick it up and put it back on the shelf behind you. There is a bidet (which tells you something about Europe if even the most questionable bathrooms in Europe have one). And lastly, there is a sink, which is pretty standard. I did notice there are two air fresheners in the bathroom. At first I was trying to figure out if that funky smell was coming from the air fresheners or if it was an attempt to mask the smell. After spending more time in the room we have come to the conclusion that it is in fact to mask the odor, but has failed miserably. It smells like death. We found the smell is coming from the corner by the window, where the bathroom wall and building wall meet. We think something died in the wall. 

Anyway, on with my description….the towels are like thermal sheets. Like the material your thermal underwear is made out of; but in the form of a sheet the length of a bath towel. I’m not complaining about that because we have been using travel towels which are just giant chamois’.  And lastly, the mattress which is a spring mattress. I’ve slept on worse but I’m not so keen on this mattress because it has yet to afford me a good night’s sleep. I can feel every spring that is supporting my boney flesh. I can only sleep comfortably on my stomach with the pillow supporting most of my upper body, but even then, having my hips dig into the springs makes me toss and turn during the night.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining in full, just describing at length my first hostel experience. We are grateful to have a place to stay for three nights with a chance to re-charge our mental batteries. I am, however, getting eaten alive by bugs. The weather has been very nice here but at the expensive of my skin. I got 5 bug bites on my right foot and 2 on the left just in one night, and that doesn’t cover other random bites on my body; Like the bite on my index finger, just under my nail. Randy has been getting bit too, with 2 on his face. He is lucky because those haven’t been itchy, but my feet are driving me crazy like I have the chicken pox. Blasted bugs! Other than that, it isn’t so bad here. There is a nice sense of community in places like this. If you have nothing to do or you want to meet new people then you just hang out in the communal areas. The walls are paper thin though, so in theory you could meet your neighbors without ever leaving your room. You could hear a pin drop down the hall, the walls are so thin. We have people right below us who feel the need to have a constant soundtrack playing to their lives. The music was going almost all night and then again every time they are in their room. It’s as if they are in our room, we can hear it so clearly. Then we heard a couple fighting, which added a little spice to our evening. All in all, it’s a hostel and you can’t really have high expectations when staying in one.

We head to Rome tomorrow to stay with a guy who is remodeling his house. He said if we want to help him with some work then we can stay as long as we like, but we will be sleeping on the floor. We will see how that goes and how long we can last sleeping on the floor. And if you don’t hear from us within a couple of weeks you might begin your search looking in the walls of his house. Just kidding moms.

Oh, last thing, Giovanni, the dead cockroach on the bathroom floor, says Hi. At least he would if he weren’t dead.

Ciao!